Lately I have been wondering what my life means. Is it being a wife, a mother, a friend, a sister, what? In the midst of my questioning the words – SOLD arrived. The season with our house in Tahoka would be coming to a close. Packing the house to move into a camper was closer than before – yes, you heard that right. We are going to sacrifice in order to fulfill the long-term goal of residing in Lubbock – it is our desire to have our son, Jerry, in the Lubbock school district. And, we have a dream in our hearts to help others know that they are not forgotten. It’s a bold dream, like the kind only God can make happen when one is willing to take steps to see what is possible. I couldn’t shake the simple thought of—is this what God really wants, or is this what my husband wants? I had to wrestle with that for a while. My husband and I are in different spiritual places and I wonder what God wants from me. After praying constantly, I felt like I was at a standstill. I wondered if I was not praying right.
Why does it seem like I can’t get God’s attention?
I felt stranded at times, but then I remembered no matter how hard the situation seems in the moment, I can still smile and be happy… because I know God will never give up on me. God is always with me no matter how I might feel.
I am now realizing that I am probably in one of “those” seasons where I need to trust in silence and wait; which I’m horrible at. It maybe that I don’t hear Him the way I would like and I am embracing that. I also know I must refuse to listen to the lies of satan when he tries to makes it seem that I’m not hearing Him at all. My plan: continue to pray and wait.
Okay, maybe it took me a month. I now realize that this transition is a good thing. Change is good. I know that this is what God wants. Everything is going very smoothly. We ended up going under contract in just 2 weeks of our house being on the market. We will be out of our house by the 8th of April. Eventually we will have land and a barndominium here in Lubbock area. Sometime in the future, God wants us to have small houses so people can live in for a short time while getting finances organized, moving from out of town, or just needing a place to stay for a few days. This is really happening.
All three of us are excited about the new adventure God has for us. We are awaiting what amazing things will come next. My husband and I have been wanting to help more and now we see that this is the way God wants us to help others. We will have a big room for ministry work whether its bible studies, hosting a get together for families, or even just befriending more people in the Lubbock area showing them who Christ is and what He is all about. I don’t know what all God has instore for us, but we know it can only get better from where we are at. I know I have to trust Him with my whole heart.
“And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.”